Klaus Mähring, Inside and Out, Morocco 2011
printed and compiled in Mirleft 25.2.2011
Praefatia, Austria
26.8.2010
I kept on thinking and thinking, stoned thinking.... and as I think I know, this is rather in the way of the Direct Action! It leads to being preoccupied, and in arts (the way I see it) this is wrong. This is exactly the mistake of the conceptual approach: If one is preoccupied, one will only manifest what one already knows. And who needs that!?
Inside and Out
24.01.2011
Lining up for the border/ferry to Morocco, just said goodbye to Undi.
Lenny Krevitz is singing 'I want to get away' on the radio.
Heavy storms & rain (the radio says 'stay in bed today').
I am excited to leave the continent for an unknown country and two months of solitude. Besides my existing dialogue with photography (mostly equilibric, well composed 8x10s, as well as the portraits), I ponder upon what a new thread could be. Let's see.
26.1.2011
and I ponder and ponder.... does one ever know what one will find? my approach right now seems pretty hollow to me. what do I want from a country?
27.1.2011
took two pictures with the 8x10. pure landscapes I'd say; but one never knows.
a possible thread: very wide pictures with the bus in them.
29.1.2011
This whole decision, to leave into uncertainty instead of being Viennese in Vienna (means to whine, negativity &all), this decision started this feeling, that has been accompanying me ever since. The feeling of this or nothing. If I run aground, it doesn't even help much to go back to Vienna; it's not like I am hording gold there.
So this is a decision to never do a normal job again (aih, that's too dramatic!). But that's how it feels.
Anyway, it is strange to travel like this. Somewhere between uncertain driving around on the one hand, and demanding many things from myself on the other side. Things like: Purpose, output.... The purpose question is what makes me think the most these days. Output ok, I make pictures, and with this I guess I am actually fullfilling this quest. But purpose? What do I expect to find for myself in those extra-weird places I am seeking? I guess the answer is something like this: For sure I arrive in Morocco and first thing is irritation. Paranoia. Uncertainty. Even danger. Then I slowly get to know the ways. But I also find out that it is almost impossible to sit in the bus undisturbed, so I started hiding, turning the lights down and shit... everybody wants to talk to me. And bien sur there is always the whole bus to worry about (even if I tell myself that's bullshit!). So a whole lot of things to disconcert me.
So in all this, if I will again find my middle, and the balanced state of mind, that makes all those things don't bother me, I will be again one step up my own petit ladder ;). so much for a purpose.
And that makes me realise that I am not 'in the middle'. C'est ca! I guess this is why all the time I am searching for a spot to stay, chill and relax, to wrap up this intense first leg of my trip to Morocco. I am thinking of a place with a view, not too much disturbance, a cafe close by....
In the desert it's hot during the day and cold at night!
Epilogue
4.2.2011
the day started nice today; in a good mood after some nice communication on the internet yesterday, updated on the world news according to CNN and Al Jazeera. after coffee & co. my host, Ismail, which owns the hotel, invited me for a little puff puff in his room, meaning two small pipes of weed. usually not my thing to start a day, but this cheered me up more, and I took the roads with a good swing. still fucking my brain up with thinking and thinking about me, morocco and photography. I think it is just too beautiful here, tons of postcards but no really weird stuff, at least not to the european eye. I hoped at least for something to contrast that beauty.
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